So Dead, My Love Read online

Page 18


  “Lara?”

  Lara remained frozen.

  “Lara? What’s wrong?” Samantha shook her. Her eyes remained focused ahead on nothing. She couldn’t hear Samantha. “Lara, please, what’s wrong?” Samantha grabbed her face and slapped her cheeks lightly. “Look at me, Lara. My god, Lara, tell me what’s wrong.”

  Lara blinked once and Samantha saw recognition replace the fog she’d seen there before. Her body relaxed in Samantha’s arms.

  “What happened, Lara? You were somewhere else.”

  Lara pulled away from Samantha. “It is Wilmon. He invaded my mind. He knows my thoughts and he knows I am free.” She turned her back slowly to Samantha.

  “What does that mean? Are you in danger?”

  Lara leaned her head back and sighed. “No, my darling. I have nothing to fear from Wilmon.” She turned back to Samantha and caressed her cheek. “It is you he will want. As long as you and I are together, you remain a threat.”

  Samantha couldn’t stop her insides from doing flip-flops. Things had gone from bad to worse.

  “Samantha. I must protect you. We must leave this land immediately.”

  The knocking on the door nearly scared Samantha out of her shoes.

  “Samantha, open the door! I know you’re in there.” Carmen banged on the door again.

  Chapter 17

  The look on Lara’s face changed from loving concern to an ugly grin. “Did you invite her here?”

  “No.” Samantha didn’t know what to say, what to do.

  “She followed you, then? What happened tonight, Samantha?” Lara was inching toward the door.

  “Nothing happened. I mean, maybe she did follow me.”

  “Well then, let her in, Samantha. It is rude to leave your guests waiting.”

  Lara opened the door. Carmen nearly fell into the room. She wore a long overcoat and scarf.

  “Come in, Carmen. We weren’t expecting you.” Lara closed the door slowly behind her.

  Carmen brushed past Lara toward Samantha. “Sam, I need to talk to you privately.” She cast a sideway glance at Lara, who had crept up behind her.

  Samantha had to fumble for words. “Carmen, um, this is unexpected.”

  Carmen took notice of the room around her. “Sam, I’m sorry about tonight.” She looked behind her at Lara. “Can we talk, please? Privately.”

  Lara’s laughter echoed in the candlelit room. “Samantha is not herself, it appears. She hasn’t told you about us? Perhaps later she will explain. But please don’t let me interrupt you. What you say to Samantha is of importance to me as well.” She stood with her arms crossed, the unmistakable blood lust making her eyes blaze yellow in the darkness.

  Samantha lunged at Carmen, grabbing her by the shoulders, and shoving her out the door. She saw Carmen tumble face first into the snow outside. Samantha slammed the door shut and latched it. She turned to face Lara.

  Lara ran furiously to Samantha and took hold of both her arms, her face so close that Samantha could smell the blood on her breath. “What have you done? You seek to protect her? From me? I see what is your mind and in your heart. Why have you betrayed me?!” Underneath the fury was pain.

  Samantha looked at her, directly and without fear. Lara’s dark eyes were demanding, her thin lips open in shock. Samantha’s heart was being torn to shreds. She still loved this woman. This vampire. She was never a religious woman, but she began to pray silently for answers, for the right thing to do. Only Lara answered her.

  “Don’t you see what you’ve done, Samantha?”

  Abruptly, the violence in Lara subsided. She let go of Samantha’s shoulders and turned away from her, crossing her arms.

  “Help me understand, my Samantha.” Her voice sounded so weak, so defeated.

  Samantha couldn’t hold back the hysteria. She fell at Lara’s feet, face buried in hands, not bearing to look at her.

  “Leave now, Lara. Disappear into the night. I can’t live through this. I can’t live like this. My dear God, I love you but I just can’t...” The cold, gentle hands of Lara Karnov picked her up off the floor and took her chin so that they were eye to eye. Samantha was frightened like she had never been frightened in her life.

  Through her tears, she focused on the blackness of Lara’s eyes. She didn’t see murder. She didn’t see madness. She most certainly didn’t see cruelty. What she saw was something more ancient and more powerful than any human mind could imagine or hope to comprehend. Eternity looked out at her, veiled in grief and sadness.

  “I cannot live without your love. Have you not understood this? Samantha, what good is this new life if I don’t have you? What good is immortality if you are forever lonely?”

  It could have been so easy to give in, to take Lara in her arms, make love to her like she foolishly wanted to right this minute, and run away. Keep running to whatever ends of the earth they needed to go to be safe. Maybe she could have learned to murder without thought, without guilt. Without conscience.

  But every fiber that made Samantha Barnes who she was knew it could never be. The desire for the real life she had here, for the new, unexplored feelings for Carmen, all this was a stronger pull.

  “You have brought me to my doom, Samantha. You chose her over me. Nothing I do now matters.” There was a glimmer of disbelief in those dark eyes.

  “No!” Samantha screamed and jumped to stand between Lara and the door. “Don’t, Lara. Let’s just leave now. I’ll go wherever you want me to go.”

  Samantha was ready to forget all her moral objections. Push aside the fears that had been tearing her apart and just run with Lara.

  But Lara wasn’t listening. Lara’s face was a mask of cold rage. She kept moving toward the door, forcing Samantha to inch back.

  “Samantha, let me in!” Carmen banged again on the door.

  “Yes, let her in Samantha.” Lara was taunting her. “Make a choice, Samantha. Come away with me. Let me show you what an eternity of love can be.”

  “This is insane!”

  “There can be no one else but me Samantha. She will not have you.”

  “Lara, please…” Samantha pressed back against the door.

  “Samantha, you can be forever with me.”

  Carmen’s fists made booming sounds.

  “No!” Samantha suddenly turned away from Lara, right out the door and straight into Carmen’s arms. They nearly fell over each other.

  “Sam!”

  “Oh my God, Carmen, you have to get away from here!”

  Carmen held on to her. “What the hell is going on here?”

  “Please, Carmen. Go home now.” Samantha’s eyes darted back to the open door. Lara was standing framed in the doorway.

  Carmen looked briefly at Lara, then back anxiously at Samantha. “Has she hurt you? I came because I suspected her of having something to do with the murders. Now I’m sure she killed Gillian.” The anger mounted in Carmen’s voice. “We’ve got to get away and call the police.” Carmen tried to pull Samantha away.

  “No, Carmen, no. She didn’t kill Gillian.” Samantha pleaded.

  “I won’t let her harm you, Sam.”

  In spite of all the madness, Samantha wanted to laugh. Of course Lara would never hurt her. Not physically. They were bound by love. Eternal love. Except Lara’s love was squeezing the life out of her. This love killed for her. And Carmen would be next.

  “Carmen!” The word struck Samantha like a piercing stab in the brain. Lara was using telepathy to summon Carmen to her. If she got to Carmen, there would be no saving her.

  Carmen suddenly jerked her head toward Lara and tried to disengage herself from Samantha. Samantha tugged at her.

  “No. Carmen don’t! Listen to me! Don’t look at her!”

  She grabbed Carmen tighter with both her hands and held on to her. Samantha felt like a football player attempting a tackle.

  Carmen stood dazed, gazing helplessly at Lara.

  “Let her go!” Lara commanded inside Samantha’s head. �
��She can be for the both of us. I will not harm her.” she continued in a softer, more tender tone.

  Samantha tried to block Lara out of her thoughts. It was hard. Lara’s own blood ran through her veins. Death had married them and now the Devil would have to take them both.

  When Samantha looked at Lara, her eyes were bright red in the darkness. This was it. There could be no turning back now. No second guessing. No remorse. The decision she made now would either give her life or deliver her into darkness.

  The irony of it all stung Samantha through the heart sure as if a stake had been driven into her. She had come to Lara Karnov in search of salvation and found damnation. But within the maelstrom she had found Carmen.

  “Samantha, why do you resist? Why have you turned against me?” There was anguish in Lara’s voice.

  Samantha had to shut it out. Never in her life had she been presented with such choices. She had to give up a lifetime with Lara to save a life. Carmen’s life.

  Carmen was still struggling to get away from her grasp, but Samantha held on tighter, finally taking a firm hold of Carmen’s waist. There was only one way to end this. She turned Carmen swiftly to face her and laid a hard punch to the side of Carmen’s head.

  Carmen slumped sideways, pulling Samantha down with her.

  Tossing Carmen’s dead weight aside as gently as she could, Samantha struggled to her feet, looking back to the door for Lara.

  She was gone. Samantha ran towards the house, through the door and found Lara standing next to the portrait of herself on the easel. Her eyes met Samantha.

  “You have destroyed everything, Samantha.” She shook her head. “The love you gave me you have now ripped from me.”

  Samantha hesitated, not sure she wanted to move any closer. Lara smiled a weak smile at her.

  “You are even afraid of coming to me. I could never harm you.”

  A lump formed on Samantha’s throat. She couldn’t understand all the emotions that were wracking her mind. She wanted very much to hold Lara close.

  She walked swiftly to the thin, pale woman in black and wrapped her arms around her, feeling the cold seep through every pore in her body. Confused and bewildered, she had a foolish thought.

  She wished she could turn the clock back and forget everything about Lara Karnov. Move the hands all the way back to before she had ever set eyes on Lara.

  “Lara, I do love you, but I can’t be what you are. I can’t do this.”

  Lara pulled back to look at her. “You are the chosen one.”

  “No, I’m not. And if I am, maybe you don’t need me anymore.”

  As her voice died in the room, she thought of the many times those words had been drilled into her. Goodbyes seemed to be scripted generic to all. Same words. Different cast.

  Lara didn’t say a word. Instead, she walked away from Samantha, to stand before the fire.

  “Samantha, I never told you everything about our-” she paused and turned her head sideways to look at Samantha. “I never explained everything about my way of life About the Karnovs. We can be hurt, you know. We can be destroyed.” Lara reverted her attention to the fire still burning hot in the fireplace.

  Samantha wondered silently about Carmen outside. She might be coming to any moment. Sam eyed the open door nervously.

  “Fire, Samantha. The only thing that will consume us and send us to that eternal place of rest is fire. Just like humans. Ashes to ashes, dust to dust.”

  Lara turned slowly to face Samantha and her face suddenly looked too thin, lips pale and drawn down in a sad contemplation.

  “You were the chosen one, my dear Samantha. You have given me what I wanted most. In finding it, I have also found my salvation.” She shook her head gently. “The pain of giving up love for love’s sake is far worse than I imagined. Without me, Wilmon cannot find you. Perhaps this is all part of the prophecy. Perhaps this was all destined to occur. Goodbye, Samantha, my love.”

  Something in her eyes and voice scared Samantha. She heard the sound of shuffling feet just outside the door. Carmen. Samantha ran to the open doorway to see Carmen stumbling her way towards her. She had to get Carmen safely away from here, make up another lie quickly.

  When Carmen saw her, she put a hand to her head. “What the hell hit me? I just blacked out.”

  Samantha pushed her back, away from the door.

  “Go home, Carmen. I’m okay. I’m not in any kind of danger. We’ll talk later. I promise.”

  Carmen didn’t look convinced. She kept looking inside the house. “Sam, this is all nuts. I’m not leaving until I get some answers. She’s a dangerous woman. I just don’t get it. You could be in danger if you stay here, besides, you distinctly said the name Lara instead of Sara. Sam, either you need help or your Sara is really...”

  Samantha didn’t let her finish because suddenly, like a bomb in her head, the whole world burst into flames. The pain in her brain was like a chorus of shrieking voices—and Lara’s was the loudest. She ran away from Carmen and through the door, almost tripping, Carmen right behind her.

  “Lara!”

  She heard the crackling of the flames first and then the smell of smoldering flesh grabbed at her throat and made her nose burn. Lara had set herself on fire!

  Her face, enveloped within the flames, looked out at Samantha, black eyes staring like coals within the fire.

  “No!” The scream that had been building in Samantha’s throat roared out in a bloodcurdling shriek.

  She ran frantically and picked up the throw on the couch. She had to do something to save Lara. She wanted to embrace the figure in flames. She wanted release in the searing fire, cleansing her of all that had tainted her. And she could be one with Lara.

  But Carmen grabbed her from behind, holding her tight.

  Samantha struggled as both she and Carmen watched, horrified, as the figure of walking fire rushed past them out into the cold of night.

  “Let me go!” Samantha punched wildly at Carmen.

  “Sam, stop! You can’t save her. She’s gone. It’s over.”

  Samantha still insisted on release until finally, she jumped full force on Carmen’s toes. Carmen let go immediately, stepping back and cursing under her breath. Moving quickly, Samantha was gone out the door, running madly after Lara.

  The sight of the burning figure ahead of her was something she would never forget. A living, breathing figure of fire dancing madly through the dark woods, sparks of fire flying behind it like doomed fireflies. Lara was heading down the path toward the beach. Toward the ocean.

  “Stop, Lara!” Samantha was yelling so hard her throat felt like it would rip apart. There was no answer. Not even in her brain. The only sound that she heard was the surf splashing over rocks. They were getting closer to the beach.

  Lara was slowing down as the path dipped down and the beach became visible. In the distance to their right, the rocky cliffs loomed blacker than the evening sky.

  Pieces starting falling from Lara’s blazing body. Samantha pushed those horrifying images from her mind. She couldn’t afford to stop and think about what they could be. She just knew she had to catch Lara. Save her somehow. Behind her, she thought she heard footsteps. Carmen.

  Samantha ran right past something that was still burning on the ground. Whatever it had been, the smell choked her. She coughed as she continued running downward. Lara was already on the beach. As Samantha cleared the final part of the path, she jumped onto the sand below.

  It was colder here and the wind sent tiny little particles of sand into her face. She rubbed hard at her eyes, making it worse. Lara had stopped ahead of her. The wind was whipping the flames into a flickering frenzy. Samantha kept running until she was within feet of her, the intense heat radiating outward even at that distance.

  Then suddenly the wind calmed. The crashing of the waves around them sounded like a roar. Samantha noticed that the flames were beginning to extinguish themselves, the blackened remains within still standing. Just as Samantha lurched
awkwardly forward, still holding the throw in her hands, the figure of Lara collapsed.

  Samantha stopped abruptly, hesitating just long enough to be tackled from behind. Carmen put both her arms around her, pinning Samantha’s arms to her side.

  “Let her go, Sam! You can’t help her. She’s already dead.” Samantha didn’t fight her. She had no strength left. No reason. Instead, she sank back against Carmen, feeling the warmth of Carmen’s body seep through her, and watched as the blackened, stick-like figure lying in the sand crawled its way toward the incoming surf. The flames that had burned so fiercely away at the life of Lara Karnov had been all but completely smothered. Only small, candle-like flickers still persisted, and those too were washed over as the rushing tide splashed over the black shape. What remained of Lara’s body was carried away, rolling over and over, out into the Atlantic.

  Samantha fell slowly to her knees, feeling the cold, wet sand creep into her pants. There was silence. An almost unbearable silence. The quiet in her mind was deep. So used to Lara’s persistent presence, the emptiness was disturbing. Lara was gone. Dead. Inside her mind, Samantha fought hysteria.

  Lara was a vampire. They didn’t do things like this. None of it made any sense. Vampires killed people. They took their blood and moved on. They didn’t take their own lives because they were rejected. It was all so crazy. So senseless.

  Samantha could no longer control the emotions flooding through her. She sobbed, throwing her head back and crying out loudly into the wind. Carmen stood back, respectful of the emotional outpouring. Samantha looked out at the tide, coming and then slinking back into the mother ocean, taking everything it touched. Keep looking, she told herself. Lara could come back. She could be flung back out onto the beach like Venus on the half shell. She might still be alive. But reality intruded. A soft touch on her shoulder reminded her.

  “Come on baby. It’s cold out here,” Carmen whispered softly into her ear.

  Samantha was still swimming in confusion. Carmen was right. Lara wasn’t coming back. She knew it. Every part of her body, her mind, knew it. It was only her heart that insisted on holding on.